We saw, last week, the command of not going near the woman or her home. Today, we are going to look at the consequences if we do not listen to that command. For this we are, Lord willing, going to look at Proverbs 5:9-14, or as far as we can get today.

As we begin in Proverbs 5:9, failure to stay away from the immoral woman will start off by giving our honor to others. This is our honor, majesty, vigor, beauty, and royal. What is interesting, based on the Theological Dictionary of the Old Testament is,

That Independence and autonomy belong to the “honor” of man so that the threatening and loss of wealth can mean the loss of honor.”

This shows then the splendor and honor of the man who goes into the woman, lets that woman and others take his honor. There is, in our culture, a mindset which attributes encouragement and congratulations to any man who is able to take any woman. These kinds of “friends” often give high fives, pats on the back, and commend the individual for doing this.

But, what is often not shown is the shame that comes, not only on the individual who is then caught. It leads to the destruction of their own families, but it also destroys the other woman’s family, if they have one. At the least, the individuals of both families are shamed by the actions of the individual, and they are never viewed the same way again.

That leads to the trust aspect. If they are willing to use and lose a woman, are they really someone we would have a high view of? Then, add in a family. A man who cheats on his wife, or a woman who cheats on her husband, how does that diminish their appearance before the family in laws? Their own family? What is worse, how does God view them? In the Old Testament law, God commanded for them to be put to death (Leviticus 20:10). While we live in the age of grace (John 8:10-11), there is still the stigma attached to this individual.

Then we look at the next part. Their years are given to the cruel one. I have been doing some watching, listening, and reading on the modern-day philosophy and constructs of relational structures between men and women, between traditional, feminism, and modernism roles and the action and reaction of those things. There is a growing disconnect between men and women. We are not going to go into the judicial issues and subsets here as to why (suffice it to say the courts are egregiously slanted away from men in this realm), but it is fascinating to now see this coming to full fruition.

Suffice to say, when either a man or a woman put themselves into the realm of hard partying and sleeping around, even if they are married, they will be giving their years to the cruel ones. These are the ones who will use and lose the other. Then when age catches up (for the women it is often called the wall, and for some men, a mid-life crisis), the reality is they handed their younger years and life to those who do not care.

Proverbs 5:10 gives us the next horrible event and that is the wealth and labors go to others. This is clearly seen when children are had. For the women, when they have children from an affair or a tryst, often-times there are many nets for them. There are times when they will have to pay child support or alimony to the father, but this is few and far in between.

Men, hear me clearly. If you involve yourself with a woman who is not your wife (which there are some wives who do take advantage of their husbands and that is another topic), if you have a child with her, you are going to be giving your wealth to others. There is a video of a woman who was bragging that she had six children from six men. Why? If she had six children from one man she would get 17% (her numbers) of his income for child support. Total being about $400 a month. But with six different men, her math worked out to making over $2k a month!

The system is broke.

Men, women, especially men in our society today, if you give yourself over to the immoral woman, you should expect to find yourself paying your wealth to them. But this verse goes one. Your labors go to the house of a foreigner.

This text shares exactly what we see. When a woman divorces, or leaves (which some judges have in fact awarded women half of what was owned even when they weren’t married), the home still has to be up kept. The household still needs the work. Men, you are going to be giving yourself over to this and your labors are going to be going to something or someone else. If children are involved, you are doing double duty.

Lastly, Proverbs 5:11-14 brings to the finality of days. In Proverbs 5:11, you will mourn at last, and you are going to be consumed. Your whole life is now lost and will never return. The time and energy you could have spent building your own home, your own family, your own life is now split and lost because of the immoral woman.

Women, if you do decide to follow the path of feminism, you will be like so many that I have been reading and researching. You will find, when you get to that point, that the home, the family, the good men who were at one point simply in the “friend zone,” you will have your cold corner office and an empty home. The good men are married with families, and lives that were available back when you were younger.

Then the flesh being consumed, this could be speaking not only of being worn out but it also can reflect the STD’s from a promiscuous lifestyle that can and will cut any life short. And what is being said?

Proverbs 5:12 – Instruction was hated, and correction was despised. We have covered these words already in Proverbs so I will not comment much here. For a better understanding

Hated: Proverbs 1:22, 29

Instruction: Proverbs 1:2-3, 7-8, 3:11; 4:1, 13

Despised: Proverbs 1:30

Correction: Proverbs 1:23, 25, 30; 3:11

Instead of heeding the traditional roles, and the Biblical authority and instruction, these individual self-destruct and their lives are uprooted simply because they have decided it was more important to have sexual intercourse than it was to follow God’s standards. It was more important for physical pleasure than Spiritual truth. It was more important to have cultural standards of success and femininity than physical piety and purity. Sure, those who hold to the truth will be mocked, looked down upon and laughed at because they do not have the “body count” of how many they slept with.

But they also have a home, a man or woman who loves them, children to train, and raise up, a place they can and will know true fulfillment and happiness (a corner office is nice but cold), and their lives will be complete.

Notice what the Proverbs says in Proverbs 5:13-14. This individual says they did not obey the teachers or inclined their ear to the instructions. They ignored those who had been there and done that. And the lure and pull of societies “standards” was too much. The fear of missing out was too much and their life is wasted. As it says in proverbs 5:14, they were on the verge of ruin in the midst of the assembly and congregation.

This means they are being seen as self-destructing in the midst of those around them (in this case the body of faith or church) but in everyone, those families and friends who are watching and trying to warn them. It falls on death ears.

I know this seems to be rambling, but I am burdened by the state of marriage, men, and women today. I will say this, the reports and information I am reading and studying does not come from a Christian perspective. Both sides are calling for traditional roles back into the family. Feminist say it will be a return to the 1950’s. Those who are going back say it is a return to something more meaningful.

As a Christian, I will say they do not go far enough. What they are calling for, and what they are desiring as a return to traditionalism, as a Christian we will say, let us return to God’s standard. That is the ONLY way we can find fulfillment as men and women. That is the only way we can find happiness and truth. That is the only way we will see families and stability return. I believe the Trad-Wife (not saying it is all perfect) and the Traditional Masculine male role models are moving in the right direction. Without God, it will be only partially successful.

Has it become apparent and why Proverbs 5:1-6 is starting to look so much more important and vital? What if young men and women start to reclaim their traditional roles?

As I said, I have been studying this out the last two days and it is fascinating. There is a new report which has the headline “Gen Z is walking away from Feminism.” All I can say is good. There is a difference between feminism and femininity. What happens if the men decide they are going to follow God’s standard and look for His approval on morality and truth, rather than seeing how many women they can get and how many pats they can get from their drunk friends? What if men started being men. Making the standards for themselves and the standards for what they look for in their wife. What if women held a high standard, they know who they are in Christ and what becomes more important is not how big the man’s wallet is or his house but how strong his character is. What if men started living the Godly roles and requirements found in passages such as Ephesians 5:22-33? What if Women, reading Ephesians 5:22-23 take that as how they will live? What if a lady, a true lady, looks toward Proverbs 31:10-31 and instead of seeking her own “free agency” she seeks Godly truth and roles and she puts into practice what she finds here? What if both men and women establish a standard that is built on God’s Word and not their own desires and they deny themselves as in Galatians 5:24?

What if, men, you take the lead you were designed by God to have, and act and live as God called you to live, and you did what we find in, oh say, Proverbs 5:15-20? That we will look at next